Random Notes on a New World

More than a few years back, in a time of challenging transition after my mother had died, my dearest friend remarked to me that “every decision you make affects your survival.” That one took a while to sink in.

Now, in fact, it appears that every decision we do make affects our survival, from disinfecting handles to everything we touch, and let’s face it folks, while most of us Yankees may take pride at being reserved, we sure are (at least subliminally) touchy-feely.

Give yourself a minute (use an egg-timer—and  yes, I’m dating myself) and count the number of things that you touch entering your home: keys, door, handle, jumping huggy dog, perhaps jumping huggy child(ren), coat, coatrack, hat, hair, mask, face, the list goes on….

MASK. Yes, that’s the new normal. The four things on my mental list as I leave the house: keys, phone, wallet, mask. They have replaced fragrant tree car deodorizers and fuzzy dice hanging from the rearview mirror. They are required everywhere we go, and now, instead of noticing who has a mask, we tend to focus a bit of misdirected resentment for who doesn’t wear a mask, or who isn’t “social distancing”. And what an abject silly phrase that has come to be. Yep, I’m a little on edge, and I don’t think that I’m the only one.

My neighbor and occasional shopping companion commented recently that nothing is like it used to be when we grew up: “You mean having to plan trips when stores are closed up early? You mean actually washing our hands every single time our mothers told us to? You mean, having to make do with what we have?”

I think we’re back there. Not that I’m going to put dried beef (the kind that comes in the star embossed jar that we later saved for drinking glasses) on my grocery list.

I’m calling my new philosophy “Zen-kee”, a cross of Zen: mindfulness and thoughtful consideration (trying  like hell to let go of judgment—and yes, that smidge of entitlement) with a healthy dose of Yankee common sense.

At least, that’s what I’m going with now. That is, if the dog doesn’t stop wanting to go out altogether, as we’ve already been out seven times, and that’s just this morning. She’s ready for a nap.

 Mary Oliver