Dear Auntie Mac,

New neighbors arrived soon after Covid struck in March of 2020, and by the time I was vaccinated, we’d plunged back into the depths of the pandemic.  Because of this, I have not extended the courtesy of meeting the “new folks next door.”  It seemed unwise to introduce myself, pre-vaccination and while the virus spread, and what feels awkward now is — Howdy!  Welcome to the neighborhood! – two years late. I know I’m not alone in this social quandary.

A Good Neighbor

My Dear Neighbor:

Auntie Mac certainly finds no fault in suffering from new-neighbor avoidance; she completely understands the desire to not zip over with banana bread before the movers have left the driveway. However, as you undoubtedly know, the pandemic alone cannot be held responsible for lifting the drawbridge of communication between your castle and the as-yet unknown invading army. It is time to, as Lars would say, suck it up and take a firm stand on the moral high ground, from which I have always found the view to be superior.

While Auntie Mac has always been a devotee of genteel subterfuge, she believes that in this case, honesty is indeed the best policy, albeit packaged as a thoughtful gift. You are fortunate that your conscience roused itself from its nap at the outset of the holiday season. Never has the time been better to introduce yourself to your neighbors, via a charmingly decorated note left in their mailbox. Extend your most profuse apologies for not introducing yourselves sooner. Commiserate that the pandemic has put everyone’s social interactions in a bit of a confusing tailspin. Embroider the truth a bit by suggesting that you were eagerly waiting for a glimpse of them taking a walk past your house in order to make an unobtrusive introduction, but alas, you saw them not. But now as the holidays approach you have been seized with a desire to host a small, safe gathering at your home and would they do you the honor of attending a pre-winter tea at a time and day convenient to them? You would be most eager to find out how they find their new home, and if they have not yet availed themselves of any community activities, nothing would give you more pleasure than to provide detailed information and tips. And certainly they may bring their 5-year-old grandchild and three Pomeranians to your house–whyever did they have to ask first?

Auntie Mac must at this juncture also gently point out that newcomers are also, in their own way, responsible for initiating exploratory forays into their new community. It may well be that your new neighbors are feeling some of the same awkwardness for not, as the interlopers, announcing themselves to you sooner. If this is the case, then there will be plenty of apologizing and self-admonition to be passed round with the canapés—which I find is nearly as good a social lubricant as the brandy you will have on hand in case things go south and you are removing Pomeranian fur out of the carpet for weeks to come. Bon chance!

Your Auntie Mac