Aunt Sally was a very special lady: Movie star pretty, always cheerful, eternal sparkle in her eye, ready with cookies, a meal or a prank for us kids. And always interested in what we had to say or gotten up to. Even as dementia was taking her she maintained her sparkle and cheerfulness. She passed in 2020 at age 81. She and Uncle Rich had been married for more than 60 years. A couple days before she passed, I visited her in the nursing home. She had been going in and out of consciousness for several days. When I entered her room she opened her eyes and greeted me with a bright and loving, “Jack.” And then she asked, “Where did you get the birdseed?” I was gob-smacked – knocked back. How on earth did she know my wife had reminded me to get birdseed before I left? I had.

We just don’t know what flights thee mind and soul take when a loved one is preparing to cross the bridge. Later going through her things, the following poem was found in her sewing box. It was for Uncle Rich.

WHEN I MUST LEAVE YOU

When I must leave you
for a little while,
Please do not grieve
and shed wild tears
And hug your sorrow
to you through the years,
But start out bravely
with a gallant smile;
And for my sake
and in my name
Live on and do
All the things the same,
Feed not your loneliness
on empty days,
But fill each waking hour
in useful ways,
Reach out your hand
to comfort and cheer
And I in turn will comfort you
And hold you near;
And never, never
Be afraid to die,
For I am waiting
For you in the sky!

I visited Uncle Rich often after Sally passed. Uncle Rich was not afraid. He passed within the year. I visited the day before he passed. On this, as on previous visits, he would always say, “ I can’t believe I will never see Sally again,” and a lonely tear would appear in the corner of his eye. He would wipe it away before it could drop free. Many of us suspect he had stopped taking his heart medication. Love conquers all.

Uncle Grumpus